Learning to Budget and Invest in You

In a world that often measures success by the size of our paycheck or the brand of our belongings, I want to share a different perspective—one that focuses on the investment of relationships over monetary wealth.

Over the last 23+ years, my family could have earned over $1.2 million more than we have, not including benefits, if I had continued my planned corporate finance career. I’m the numbers nerd here, and I like knowing what’s at stake. But instead, I made the intentional choice to stay home and homeschool our children when our daughter was born.

Don’t get me wrong, being a stay-at-home mom is not ideal for everyone. AND I have deep respect for the moms out there who are working, raising kids, and keeping her sanity!!

The Pressure We All Feel

As a high-achieving woman, you might often feel overwhelmed by society’s expectations. The pressure comes from every direction—school activities, birthday parties, name-brand clothes, electronics, or even cars for your kids. It can feel like an unrelenting weight, making it easy to believe that more money will bring a better life for our families. But here’s the truth: knowing our priorities matters more than any paycheck.

Sure, choosing discipline and goals means missing out on some shopping sprees, social media-worthy vacations, and fine dining. But when I look back, I can confidently say I don’t feel like I missed a thing. The life we’ve built over the last 23+ years wasn’t exactly what I envisioned—it turned out even better. Living without financial stress is an investment that money just can’t buy.

Investing in Your Family

When you prioritize your family, you create a legacy that goes beyond any dollar figure. Removing financial stress from our money habits allows us to live in a way that doesn’t involve sacrificing family time or memories. When we plan family vacations, we make sure they’re filled with fun and adventure—without blowing the budget. Now, just because we’re on vacation doesn’t mean the budget’s on vacation too! (Though I wouldn’t mind laying down the cash sometimes.)

One trick we use is staying in places where we can cook. Breakfast at our rental gives us a relaxed start to our days before heading out for fun. We pack a cooler with water and snacks for the road to avoid the pricey gas station pit stops. A snack stop for a family of four can easily hit you for $20 each time! My husband takes charge of the cooler, knowing I’d be the first to cave and buy every snack I ever loved!

Another hack we have enjoyed is reciprocal memberships to zoos and aquariums. It’s a small investment that lets us explore new places at little to no extra cost. I’m also a fan of finding deals online, sometimes using Groupon or buying local discount cards through schools. I’ve never been one for the extreme couponing lifestyle—it’s all about finding what matters to your family and enjoying what you love without the guilt.

Dining out has always been a favorite family treat for us. Back in our debt-free journey, I refused to cut it out completely. I didn’t grow up eating out often, so it felt special. Dining out to me was an important part of teaching our kids social skills, and let me tell you, they do it better than we do!
Fun Fact: on our first date, my husband took me to a restaurant, and I was so clueless I ordered just a side of fries. 

Living With Intention

Even when money was tight, we always wanted to make memories that would last a lifetime.

And yes, things may still get tight, even debt-free.

Living without debt doesn’t mean you’re throwing cash around without a care.

Right now, we’re managing college expenses, two properties, and putting away as much as possible for retirement. Our oldest is in her sixth year, and our youngest is in his fourth of higher education. This has been an unexpected adventure for all of us!

We like to think of their college years as giving them part of their inheritance now—just while we’re here to see them enjoy it! (A little morbid, maybe, but true.) We have a healthcare major and an engineer in training at the dinner table, so conversations are never boring. Supporting them in this way has allowed us to be part of their dreams now.

If you’re wondering if we started saving for college the day they were born, the answer is no. We weren’t that “together.” Our kids qualified for Tennessee’s scholarship program, giving them two years of free college if they met the minimums, and that was our starting point. If you feel behind, don’t!

Talk to your kids about their future and dreams early—that’s the real starting point.

I’m not suggesting every parent should pay for their child’s college. Honestly, it’s not for everyone. Help your kids explore their interests—it may mean a trade school, online classes, or even working for a couple of years to find their path. Exposure to possibilities is invaluable.

Life Skills and Learning Together

I’ve talked a lot about college because it’s where we are right now, and many parents face similar decisions every year. I share our journey to encourage you to dream big, both for your future and for your kids. And if that dream doesn’t include paying for their college, that’s more than okay. Our parents didn’t pay our way through school, and we never doubted our parents’ love because they didn’t foot the bill.

One thing that was always important to us was teaching our kids life skills. They’ve been by our side from day one, learning a work ethic that will carry them further than any classroom ever could. Hands-on experience gave them a foundation in earning and managing money, and they’re miles ahead of where we were at their age.

Finding Freedom in Financial Choices

Maybe you’re earning well, but the money seems to slip through your fingers.

Without a plan, money will find a way to disappear before you realize what happened!

In 2001, when I decided to stay home with our daughter, I had no idea if it was the “right” thing. I can tell you now, managing our money thoughtfully has given me what truly matters—my family and my marriage.

Do I still like nice clothes, a comfortable home, and a few splurges? Absolutely!!! 

But I wouldn’t trade a single thing for the peace that comes from knowing what we’ve worked so hard to achieve. The sacrifices are real, but I promise they’re worth it. The satisfaction of living intentionally is greater than any impulse buy could ever be.

Your Journey Starts Here

You can live debt-free and keep your family as your priority.

It begins with a simple plan, I’ve explained a budget in this article: 6 Steps to Create a Budget.

Saying “no” when necessary, and staying focused on your goals is essential. Here are a few practical tips to help you along the way:

• Create a Family Budget: Sit down with your partner and map out a budget that reflects your values and goals. This will guide your spending and help you say yes to the things that matter.
• Prioritize Experiences Over Things: Choose activities that create memories. A picnic, a zoo day, or a movie night at home—whatever brings you together.
• Get Everyone Involved: Teach your kids to budget, save, and spend wisely. Kids’ expectations are formed by the adults around them, so keep them in the loop!
• Look for Deals: Finding discounts isn’t just for the super-frugal—it’s a smart way to enjoy more without the guilt.
• Stay Flexible: Life will throw you curveballs. Be ready to adjust, but stay focused on what truly matters.

Embrace the Journey Together

You’re capable of creating a life rich in memories and relationships. Live with intention, focus on what really matters, and remember that the richest life is found in the people we love and the experiences we share. Ready to take your first step? Download my free guide on budgeting for families and start building the life you want, one intentional choice at a time.